• Apologising for your own behaviour and being self-effacing.
• Not standing up for your own rights, or standing up for them half-heartedly so that others can disregard them.
• Not being honest about what you want or feel.

In the short term, it may reduce people's level of anxiety as they avoid conflict. But because passive people say " Yes" when they shouldn't, they frequently end up taking on too much work, or not delivering on time and the cycle of disappointment and guilt begins all over again.

The initial buzz of avoiding conflict is rapidly replaced by:

• A feeling that you have let yourself down
• Panic aboutwhat you have agreed to do
• Even lower self-esteem

In the extreme case, passive behaviour can make people ill as their confidence plummets and a cycle of guilt sets in.

If you look at the effects on other people you may well see that they are starting to show a lack of respect for you. This is because they do not know what you stand for, or maybe they doubt your integrity as a result of your passive behaviour. They may initially express their feelings by feeling sorry for you. But eventually they will start to feel irritated and cease to respect you.

The effects on an organisation are particularly damaging if you behave passively. Conflicts will not be handled handled properly and they may break out again at a later date.Difficult decisions may be avoided or delayed and this will affect the outcomes of a team's work.

• Body language - One stares at his feet to avoid expressing his feelings. Other typical behaviour might include appearing to be engrossed in other people's views to avoid being questioned yourself; fidgeting nervously; hiding behind your hair; searching thoughtfully through paperwork, etc.
• Not standing up for own's own rights - One assumes his boss needs the report urgently, making no attempt to state his own position. Managers need to prioritise in the light of real facts, not emotions. So postponing, advancing or delegating business decisions is a sound business decision reflecting the current state of resources.
• Thinking others' needs and rights are more important than one's own - One assumes he doesn't have any rights and shows this by assuming he has to work through the night; managers faced with this form of subjugation will find it hard to know what they are dealing with.
• Apologising - The passive individual will tend to apologise constantly. This makes it hard for his / her own manager.
• Not contributing own ideas - Passive people tend to think that their own ideas are worthless.
• Feeling anxious about there being too much work to do - Probably familiar to most people.

Skills Tests -> The Assertiveness Inventory -> Passive Behaviour